Tribute to Bubba the Redneck

[Rebbasser]

Bubba is generally thought to be uneducated and just a little bit this side of retarded. The truth of the matter is, he is just basically happy with himself and his life and most of the uppity, high-falutin' folks who look down their pointy noses at him don't recognize pure happiness when it looks them in the face, grins, and says "Howdy y'all."


Now, our Bubba, he works hard, usually down at the garage or at the local factory, sometimes both. He may never have the best job in the world, but he's good at what he does and somebody's got to do the dirty work. He served his country, not because somebody made him, but because he figured it was his duty to do so.


Bubba ain't never going to get rich, but he makes enough to pay his bills, help his momma and daddy out a little bit, and still have enough pocket cash to

show his lady a good time on Saturday night. What more could a man need? Bubba's not got a lot, but then, he doesn't want it all. He's happy andcontent with the fact that he's got a roof over his head, food when he wantsit, a truck and an old Harley that'll take him where he wants to go and bringhim back, and he came by it all honestly. He earned it. He's got a sweetlittle Bubbette to keep him company and make him feel right proud on Saturdaynight.

If some folks feel the need to look down on him, well, he just kind offigures that they ain't had much raising and folks can't help it if theirparents didn't raise them up right. Bubba most likely lives in a trailer or a little frame house somewhereoutside of town. The townies might take offense at his hound dogs and hisragged old pick-up truck messing up their fancy looking neighborhoods. Theywouldn't see the beauty in his twenty year old Harley and his ten year oldbass boat. He knows for sure they'd go and get all riled up when he goes toworking on his truck or his Harley early on a Sunday morning. Fancy folkslikes to sleep in.

Besides all that, the air's cleaner out here in the country so that a mancan breathe without breathing the air straight in out of another fella'smouth. Out here he can go and lay in the back of that old pickup and look upat the moon and stars and find enough peace and quiet to have a thought forhimself. Now and then his Bubbette will come out and lay with him awhile andlife don't get no better than that.

Bubba don't feel the need for fancy automobiles and fancy houses. Folkswhat has all them things has got more worries and troubles than you can shakea stick at. Now and then he gets a hankering for one of them new "dooley"trucks, but he really just can't see where it'd get him around any betterthan the one he's got. Leastways, the one he's got is paid for and if itbreaks down, he can fix it himself. He don't look to be losing no sleep overworrying about payments. The same goes for one of them big fancy houses. Heknows several folks that has them and he figures they'll die early fromworking and worrying about paying for them. A man can't enjoy nothing that'sworrying his mind to death.

Bubba enjoys his home. It's his and can't nobody ever come and take itaway from him. Leastwise, they would surely be foolish to try it. Bubba's had his proper raising. His momma and daddy done their best byhim, and so far, he don't think he's let them down too bad. He gets a littlewasted on Saturday night and raises a little hell, but he always cleans uphis own messes and pays for the damage he does. He's been slapped in thepokey a few times and most likely will be again, but he knows how to act. Heain't never got too drunk to call all the ladies "ma'am" and get the chairand the door for them.

Bubba figures all women are ladies because his momma is one and she's thelady he's known the longest. Lord knows his momma is a saint. He gave hersome grief coming up, but these days she's prone to bragging about him alittle at church on Sundays. He's a good boy--she'll tell the world!

Bubba don't get too drunk to dance. He does it well and with enthusiasm.He'll happily dance every dance if his lady wants to. You won't ever seeBubba on the dance floor with a beer in his hand. If he figures some lowlifepiece of trash is liable to steal it before he gets back to the table, thenhe'll kill it before he hits the dance floor. Only low class folks with noraising carry their beer onto the dance floor with them. Why, that'd be aninsult to the little lady, and besides that, he wants both hands free forholding onto that sweet little thing.

If Bubba happens to be dancing with someone other than his own littleBubbette, he lets the lady know right off that his heart is already thepersonal, private property of someone and he's right glad that it is. Whetherthe lady he's dancing with looks like a storybook princess or the firstcousin to pond scum, he'll make her feel like the belle of the ball. He's gotthat kind of natural charm, grace, and manners.

Bubba always lets his Bubbette know that she's the main star in hisheaven and his Bubbette surely does appreciate him. He remembers what hisdaddy told him when he was coming up. "It ain't where you live or what you'vegot that makes you a man, son. It's the look your woman gives you when shesees you coming through the door. That's what makes it all worthwhile. Ifyour woman's face don't light up like sunshine when she sees you coming, youain't doing something right and you'd better back up and take another run atit."

Bubba does a little hunting and fishing, not so much for the sport as forthe idea of being out there in the woods or on the water, thinking his ownthoughts and just resting a bit. His Bubbette understands this and don't fussat him for his ramblings. She knows everybody needs a little time forthemselves and Bubba ain't no different. He's a man, but he's also very humanwith a very human need for solitude with his own thoughts and dreams.

She knows the only kind of deer he's chasing after is the four leggedkind. She's got a good man and she knows it. He's as solid and dependable asa hunk of grey granite rock and he's got a loving way about him that wouldgive a rock a heartbeat.

It makes her feel real proud to go walking into the local dance hall onhis arm. She's got the best looking man on the place and every woman there iswell aware of it. He won't ever give her all the shine and glitter some womenseem to want and need so much, but he gives her his heart and that's the onlytreasure she'll ever want or need. Other women may have important jobs, fancyhouses, and shiny cars, but she's got her Bubba and that's something thatthose high-society rich women would gladly sell their souls for.

Bubbette remembers what her old granny once told her. "Find yourself agood man what loves you and even a tarpaper shack will be as pleasant as agolden palace. It ain't worth nothing if loving don't live there." Grannyknew what she was talking about.

Bubbas and Bubbettes are a disappearing breed, but you can still findthem working in the garages, factories, and beauty parlors of the South.There's always a few at the local wateringhole on Saturday night. They drivepickup trucks, ride Harleys, fly the Confederate flag, and keep the wheels ofthe world greased and turning. After all, when it comes right down to it,somebody's got to roll their sleeves up and do the dirty work and Bubba theRedneck and his Bubbette ain't never been too good for honest hard work.

As long as Bubba the Redneck exists the Confederate flag will fly overDixie and the roaring heartbeat of a Harley will be heard in the southernnights.

When the last Bubba the Redneck is laid to rest, the southern winds willsoftly sing "Dixie" and the southern stars will form the Confederate flagacross the heavens in his honor.

To all the good ol' boys and Bubbas out there, "God bless you."

[bassintxlady]

here's a cheer for all the "bubba's"....hip hip hooray!!!!!....good one reb....

[flfireman]

Brings a tear to my eye.

[JB]

reb,
whats a bubbette go for these days down yer way? and...
does that include a set of bibs?

[bassintxlady]

hadn't had any offers on "bubbettes"...but the bibs are a mainstay ....note the lure hangin off the pocket there JB?....hehehehehe...

[JB]

I wasn't starin at your mommybags..honest I 'twernt

[lovinfishin9]

Thats good reb.

[Crank-Bait-Frank]

That's a great one Reb!!

JB mommybags!? You crack me up.

[zooker]

hell yeah even ifin he anit the sharpest tool in the shed he knows you can't buy a soda wid dis..

zooker

[bassintxlady]

Originally Posted by JB

I wasn't starin at your mommybags..honest I 'twernt

right.....sure you weren't...lol.....

[flbassman]

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW!!!!
That was mighty nice reb.