Bass Fishing HomeBass Fishing Forums

Go Back   BassFishin.Com Forums > Additional Categories > Non-Fishing Related Talk
FAQ Community Members List Today's Posts Search

Reply
 
Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 07-09-08, 11:15 AM   #1
Fishnngolfn
BassFishin.Com Super Veteran
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,523
Talking Mrs. Smith wants a baby.

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use asurrogate father to start their family.

On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, 'Well,I'm off now. The man should be here soon.'


Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. 'Good morning, Ma'am', he said, 'I've come to...'

'Oh, no need to explain,' Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, 'I've been expecting you.'

'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?'

'Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat'.

After a moment she asked, blushing, 'Well, where do we start?'

'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there.'

'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!'

'Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.'

'My, that's a lot!', gasped Mrs. Smith.

'Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that.'

'Don't I know it,' said Mrs. Smith quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. 'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said.

'Oh, my word!' Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

'And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with.'

'She was difficult?' asked Mrs. Smith.

'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deepto get a good look.'

'Four and five deep?' said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.

'Yes', the photographer replied. 'And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush myshots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in.'

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. 'Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?'

'It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away.'

'Tripod?'

'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long.'

Mrs. Smith fainted!!!!!

Fishnngolfn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-08, 11:27 AM   #2
Jim80
BassFishin.Com Super Veteran
 
Jim80's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Thomaston CT
Posts: 3,862
Default

lol man funny as all he**
__________________
In memory of Zooker 1/11/73-7/2/2010. You will be sorely missed and never forgotten.
Jim80 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-08, 03:44 PM   #3
BigBassin144
BassFishin.Com Premier Elite
 
BigBassin144's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Toledo, Ohio
Posts: 9,463
Send a message via AIM to BigBassin144
Default

I was laughing all the time I was reading that! Good one man!

BB
__________________
As of June 14, 2014 the members of the BF.com forum have moved to basschat.yuku.com!
BigBassin144 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-08, 05:36 PM   #4
bamabassman
BassFishin.Com Premier Elite
 
bamabassman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: cedar bluff, alabama
Posts: 15,292
Default

now that i s extremily funny there.
bamabassman is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Disclosure / Disclaimer
Before acting on the content posted, you should know that BassFishin.Com may benefit financially and otherwise from content, advertising, links or otherwise from anything you click on, read, or look at on our website. Click here to read our Disclosure Policy and Disclaimer.


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:50 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
© 2013 BassFishin.Com LLC