08-19-09, 07:36 PM | #1 |
BassFishin.Com Super Veteran
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Elliston, Va.
Posts: 4,372
|
comments from cops & teachers
Teachers & Cops
These are actual comments made on students' report cards by teachers in the New York City public school system. All teachers were reprimanded (but, boy, are these funny!) 1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig. 2.. I would not allow this student to breed. 3. Your child has delusions of adequacy. 4. Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. 5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them. 6. This child has been working with glue too much. 7. When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell. 8. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming. 9. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week. 10. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others. 11. The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead. These are actual comments made by 16 Police Officers. The comments were taken off actual police car videos around the country: 16 'You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through.' 15 'Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while.' 14 'If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document.' 13 'If you run, you'll only go to jail tired.' 12 'Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you.' 11 'You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?' 10 'Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?' 9 'Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket. ' 8 'The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not.. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?' 7 'Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop.' 6 'Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven.' 5 'In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC.' 4 'How big were those 'two beers' you say you had?' 3 'No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can.' 2 'I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail.' A ND THE WINNER IS..... 1 'You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here.'
__________________
The soap box, the ballot box, the jury box, and the cartridge box. keep us free: |
08-19-09, 08:25 PM | #2 |
BassFishin.Com Premier Elite
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Shawano, WI
Posts: 7,761
|
OH SNAP!
rotfl! Those where awesome!
__________________
If you can't fix it with heavy squats or fish oil, you're probably going to die. |
08-19-09, 08:46 PM | #3 |
BassFishin.Com Premier Elite
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Southwest IN
Posts: 5,630
|
I see no reason to reprimand those teachers.
I taught a college class once. I had some really good students, some average students, and a couple who I wondered how they even got into college. Thanks God for the good students...they made it bearable.
__________________
Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing it is not fish they are after. |
08-19-09, 10:05 PM | #4 |
BassFishin.Com Premier Elite
|
lmao, those were funny, thanks for the laugh bcklash!
BB
__________________
As of June 14, 2014 the members of the BF.com forum have moved to basschat.yuku.com! |
08-20-09, 04:38 PM | #5 |
BassFishin.Com Veteran Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: MAINEIAC
Posts: 585
|
LMAO! Thos are great, I like the teachers #7 and cops#6
__________________
"If at first you don't succeed; have another beer" |
08-20-09, 07:25 PM | #6 |
BassFishin.Com Premier Elite
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: cedar bluff, alabama
Posts: 15,292
|
ya'll noticed all thes were from people living in viginy right? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, VT fans at that, ROFLMAO!
KIDDING OF COURSE LASH. gotcha though. i love them by the way.
__________________
so many lures, so little time. |
08-20-09, 08:25 PM | #7 |
BassFishin.Com Super Veteran
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Fayetteville, N.C.
Posts: 3,529
|
I think I'm going to use one of those as a sig.
__________________
Just a redneck having fun. https://www.youtube.com/user/donaldvlogsify |
08-20-09, 08:33 PM | #8 |
BassFishin.Com Premier Elite
|
Teachers #9 was awesome!
__________________
Bass fear me. Women pepperspray me..... |
08-20-09, 08:39 PM | #9 |
BassFishin.Com Super Veteran
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Fayetteville, N.C.
Posts: 3,529
|
lol, I had a teacher tell me I was stupid once. I said, "Yea, I am. And you can't figure out how to convince a idiot like me to do what ya want me to do. What's that say about you?"
__________________
Just a redneck having fun. https://www.youtube.com/user/donaldvlogsify |
08-24-09, 01:13 PM | #10 |
BassFishin.Com Super Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Spotsylvania, VA
Posts: 4,483
|
Sorry but the following was from the movie "Ransom" and not a quote from a real cop.
15 'Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while.' You'll find it when the character Gary Sinise plays comes out of the corner grocery store with another cop and a criminal in hand cuffs. |
Disclosure / Disclaimer
Before acting on the content posted, you should know that BassFishin.Com may benefit financially and otherwise from content, advertising, links or otherwise from anything you click on, read, or look at on our website. Click here to read our Disclosure Policy and Disclaimer. |
Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests) | |
|
|