Dick, and Jane

bassFishingWNY · 06-07-09, 10:36 AM

Dick was happy, today was the big day, he was going to ask Jane to marry him.
Dick is a small man, but tall. At 5’9” , only weighted 110 pounds. He fell in love with a woman that was big boned,. Jane was 5’6” and 150 pounds.
He ask her out to go for a walk along the water, and thinking about how he would pop the big question.
At 5:30 PM he picked her up, and they started out for his big day. As they walked, they seen potato chips, cheese, and crackers, and popcorn alone the shore, but Dick was to exceeded to eat. He was going to pop the big one.
As they walked within trees, he finely pop the question, Jill said yes!
He was so happy, he seen a slice of pizza on the shore, as he picked it up, it was jerked out of his hands, then it started moving for the water. So Dick walked away.
As they walk along the water front, it changed to open fields, with a few dead trees, and thick brush along the water. Then dick seen it, a limburger cheese sandwich, on rye bread.
Jill said, you are not going to eat that, are you. Dick said, if you marry me, get use to it, Limburger cheese is my favorite.
So he picked it up, and was taking a bite!

Mr. bass said I have a bite, then the line started to slowly moving sideways. Mr. catfish said I told you the stinky stuff would work, I’m not the only one that likes it. Mr. bass took the slack out of his line, and set the hook.

As Dick took a bite, pain erupted in his lower jaw. He ran to the right, trying to reach the dead trees, then left, being pulled to the water. When near the heavy brush, Dick held on, hopping to spit the hook.

Mr. bass said he’s in the brush now, Mr. catfish said try keeping his head up, don’t let him hold onto it, he will spit the hook. He’s in the water now, do you need the net? No said Mr. bass, it’s a small one. So after taking pictures, Mr. bass tossed it back on land.

Jane was frantic, seeing Dick pulled into the water, then she seen him back on land. She ran up to him, and ask if he was OK? Dick said yes, other then a sore jaw, I’ll be OK, but I think we should head back now. As they walk along the water on the way back, they seen the same potato chips, cheese, crackers, even a slice of pizza. Then Jane see it, a ham, and cheese on rye. Dick looked at it, and Jane looked at it, then Jane started running for it, as Dick yelled NOOOOOOOO!

bamabassman · 06-07-09, 12:19 PM

sounds like a fish story to me,lol. now are you putting this down as ajoke or are you antifishing? after the other thread, we are wondering.

bassFishingWNY · 06-07-09, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bamabassman

sounds like a fish story to me,lol. now are you putting this down as ajoke or are you antifishing? after the other thread, we are wondering.

???
That's right, earth is only 6000 years old, and dinosaurs wore on the ARK?

bamabassman · 06-07-09, 12:30 PM

meant i like the joke man.

nofearengineer · 06-07-09, 01:01 PM

How did Noah's Ark get brought into this?

flbassman · 06-08-09, 04:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bassFishingWNY

???
That's right, earth is only 6000 years old, and dinosaurs wore on the ARK?

We got a wise guy. And we got an ignore button.

carolina-rig-01 · 06-08-09, 10:53 PM

this guy must be the biggest idiot i have seen on here in a long time, and we have had our share of idiots so that is giving him a lot of credit.

MississippiBoy · 06-09-09, 01:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carolina-rig-01

this guy must be the biggest idiot i have seen on here in a long time, and we have had our share of idiots so that is giving him a lot of credit.

Man, do you realize who you're stacking this guy up against? If you don't, let me know, and I'll try to...

......wait for it.......
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.....clear it up for you. Kinda like a house somebody painted green, but you can still see through it. Right now, I think you're still in the dark, but it's kind of a light-ish dark, white, paper bag brown-ish darkness....

bcklash · 06-09-09, 02:02 PM

Maybe they are twin sisters.

carolina-rig-01 · 06-09-09, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MississippiBoy

Man, do you realize who you're stacking this guy up against? If you don't, let me know, and I'll try to...

......wait for it.......
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.....clear it up for you. Kinda like a house somebody painted green, but you can still see through it. Right now, I think you're still in the dark, but it's kind of a light-ish dark, white, paper bag brown-ish darkness....

man daniel i knew i could count on you to bring that up. hahahahahaha.

nofearengineer · 06-09-09, 03:41 PM

Oh...I need to hear about this.

woody · 06-09-09, 03:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nofearengineer

Oh...I need to hear about this.

Bryce, Daniel was referring to this http://www.bassfishin.com/bassfishin...ad.php?t=19528

~Mark

nofearengineer · 06-09-09, 05:27 PM

Wow...that was an interesting read.

I guess now is when I should bring up the topic: "Can you put too much water into a nuclear reactor?"

MississippiBoy · 06-09-09, 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nofearengineer

Wow...that was an interesting read.

I guess now is when I should bring up the topic: "Can you put too much water into a nuclear reactor?"

Let me call my dad tonight, and I'll have an answer for you. He worked at Grand Gulf Nuclear Station here in MS for 30+ years, and ended up in charge of the refueling floor during outages.

nofearengineer · 06-09-09, 05:51 PM

I was referring to an old episode of Saturday Night Live, where the guys got left in charge of a nuclear reactor (right, lol), with the instructions "remember, you can't put too much water into a nuclear reactor." They argued back and forth forever over what the guy really meant (add a bunch, or don't add too much). In the end, the thing melted down and they just ran for it hehe.

Bassboss · 06-09-09, 06:38 PM

Wow! That was a pretty funny joke!

How ever, I would gone with cips! They probably get bigger people that way!

06-07-09, 10:36 AM	#1
bassFishingWNY BassFishin.Com Active Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Western New York Posts: 124	Dick, and Jane Dick was happy, today was the big day, he was going to ask Jane to marry him. Dick is a small man, but tall. At 5’9” , only weighted 110 pounds. He fell in love with a woman that was big boned,. Jane was 5’6” and 150 pounds. He ask her out to go for a walk along the water, and thinking about how he would pop the big question. At 5:30 PM he picked her up, and they started out for his big day. As they walked, they seen potato chips, cheese, and crackers, and popcorn alone the shore, but Dick was to exceeded to eat. He was going to pop the big one. As they walked within trees, he finely pop the question, Jill said yes! He was so happy, he seen a slice of pizza on the shore, as he picked it up, it was jerked out of his hands, then it started moving for the water. So Dick walked away. As they walk along the water front, it changed to open fields, with a few dead trees, and thick brush along the water. Then dick seen it, a limburger cheese sandwich, on rye bread. Jill said, you are not going to eat that, are you. Dick said, if you marry me, get use to it, Limburger cheese is my favorite. So he picked it up, and was taking a bite! Mr. bass said I have a bite, then the line started to slowly moving sideways. Mr. catfish said I told you the stinky stuff would work, I’m not the only one that likes it. Mr. bass took the slack out of his line, and set the hook. As Dick took a bite, pain erupted in his lower jaw. He ran to the right, trying to reach the dead trees, then left, being pulled to the water. When near the heavy brush, Dick held on, hopping to spit the hook. Mr. bass said he’s in the brush now, Mr. catfish said try keeping his head up, don’t let him hold onto it, he will spit the hook. He’s in the water now, do you need the net? No said Mr. bass, it’s a small one. So after taking pictures, Mr. bass tossed it back on land. Jane was frantic, seeing Dick pulled into the water, then she seen him back on land. She ran up to him, and ask if he was OK? Dick said yes, other then a sore jaw, I’ll be OK, but I think we should head back now. As they walk along the water on the way back, they seen the same potato chips, cheese, crackers, even a slice of pizza. Then Jane see it, a ham, and cheese on rye. Dick looked at it, and Jane looked at it, then Jane started running for it, as Dick yelled NOOOOOOOO!

06-07-09, 12:19 PM	#2
bamabassman BassFishin.Com Premier Elite Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: cedar bluff, alabama Posts: 15,292	sounds like a fish story to me,lol. now are you putting this down as ajoke or are you antifishing? after the other thread, we are wondering. __________________ so many lures, so little time.

06-07-09, 12:30 PM	#4
bamabassman BassFishin.Com Premier Elite Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: cedar bluff, alabama Posts: 15,292	meant i like the joke man. __________________ so many lures, so little time.

06-07-09, 01:01 PM	#5
nofearengineer BassFishin.Com Premier Elite Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Southwest IN Posts: 5,630	How did Noah's Ark get brought into this? __________________ Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing it is not fish they are after.

06-08-09, 10:53 PM	#7
carolina-rig-01 BassFishin.Com Premier Elite Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Webb City, MO Posts: 6,387	this guy must be the biggest idiot i have seen on here in a long time, and we have had our share of idiots so that is giving him a lot of credit. __________________ You only live once. But if you do it right, once is enough.

06-09-09, 02:02 PM	#9
bcklash BassFishin.Com Super Veteran Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Elliston, Va. Posts: 4,372	Maybe they are twin sisters. __________________ The soap box, the ballot box, the jury box, and the cartridge box. keep us free:

06-09-09, 03:41 PM	#11
nofearengineer BassFishin.Com Premier Elite Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Southwest IN Posts: 5,630	Oh...I need to hear about this. __________________ Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing it is not fish they are after.

06-09-09, 05:27 PM	#13
nofearengineer BassFishin.Com Premier Elite Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Southwest IN Posts: 5,630	Wow...that was an interesting read. I guess now is when I should bring up the topic: "Can you put too much water into a nuclear reactor?" __________________ Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing it is not fish they are after.

06-09-09, 05:51 PM	#15
nofearengineer BassFishin.Com Premier Elite Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Southwest IN Posts: 5,630	I was referring to an old episode of Saturday Night Live, where the guys got left in charge of a nuclear reactor (right, lol), with the instructions "remember, you can't put too much water into a nuclear reactor." They argued back and forth forever over what the guy really meant (add a bunch, or don't add too much). In the end, the thing melted down and they just ran for it hehe. __________________ Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing it is not fish they are after.

06-09-09, 06:38 PM	#16
Bassboss BassFishin.Com Premier Elite Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Shawano, WI Posts: 7,761	Wow! That was a pretty funny joke! How ever, I would gone with cips! They probably get bigger people that way! __________________ If you can't fix it with heavy squats or fish oil, you're probably going to die.

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